Can our Self-Actualization be limited?

Can our self-actualization be limited? Absolutely. Are these limits insurmountable? Absolutely not. Self-actualization is the actualizing of our full humanness. It is the unleashing of those things that hinder our growth into what ought to be. Self-actualization is the movement from ‘aught’ to’ is.’ Self-actualization is not just for the few who know about it or the few who study it or the few who work at it,self-actualization is the actual potential of every person on this planet. Self-actualization is the full potential of every newborn child. But, does and has every newborn child reached this full humanness? Certainly not. Did every newborn go on to develop ego strength? Did every newborn go on to reach his or her full capacities, his or her full abilities? Certainly not. Then, is there a common thread the flows through all these certainly not’s? Are there multiple variables that if discovered and overcome that could shift the certainly not to an absolutely?

To move individuals from deficiency motivation on toward growth motivation we need to develop a society in which these lower needs can be met. The lower needs that are driven by deficiency are met by external events. The basic needs of food and drink are met by an outside source. Safety is met by an outside source; one finds safety from things in the world. Love and social adjustments comes from people outside of us. Self-esteem is a bit of a mix, but for the most part, people get their esteem for themselves based on how others treat them. Yet, even though all these needs are met by external variables, they are processed by internal representations. Food takes on meaning. Safety takes on meaning. Love, relationships, and self esteem all mean something to each of us. They are ‘lived-with’through internal representations of meaning, unique to each individual.

I think it is the right time in human history that the conception of humanness is updated. We have experienced thousands of years of recorded human history and thousands of years of philosophy to understand humanness. Technology has changed at a rapid pace, but has humanness changed with this change. Can the current human, the non actualizing human continue to survive in this current progressive technological age? With weapons of mass destruction and with economic peril and with population growth, can this planet of humans survive without humans experiencing full humanness?

I have children. One of the things that continue to amaze me, as it did again on our drive home from our family cabin the other today, was how easy and how quickly children can tease each other. It may be with a word or with a look or with a gesture, but all a kid has to do is ‘believe’ that someone is teasing them and they lose all control. It amazes me at the power we give to others over our responses. I can’t tell you how many hundreds of times I have heard, she is teasing me! He is teasing me! And with that, the child who feels teased is off equilibrium and their current status is thrown in a tumultuous whine. It also amazes me when I see adults react in the same manner. Right now there are commercials on television that seem to geared toward teaching people to not use words that offend people, yet we don’t realize that people don’t offend people, we offend ourselves.

I think it is time, today, in this age and culture that we humans learn that we are the meaning makers and external stimulus is just that, nothing more, nothing less. Instead of trying to stop one kid from teasing another, we need to teach our kids how to control the meaning they give to what the other child is doing. Instead of asking adults to not say this word or that word, we need to teach adults how to control the meaning they give to what others do or say. We can never change what others say or what body gestures others give us, but we absolutely can change how we respond and the meaning we give to those words and gestures. It seems so simple, it is. For some unknown reason, the way the current world works is we blame others for how we feel and do not realize that we are to blame for how we feel.

If we as a race of beings can ever realize that WE alone are responsible for our internal worlds, this world will receive and experience a major transformation. If we as a race of beings can ever realize that WE alone are responsible for our internal worlds, this world will receive and experience a fuller humanness and that fuller humanness is that self-actualization process. Even though it is true that there are multiple variables that affect self-actualization, there is a key thread that weaves and warps through these variables and it is that as humans, we hold things and experiences in mind, and it is that which we hold in mind that affects how we feel and how we believe and thus what results we experience and thus our full humanness is either hindered or expressed by these results.

Our self-actualization is limited by the meanings that we give to those things in our life. From deficiency needs to the higher meta-needs or growth needs, the self-actualization of the individual; one person at a time, requires that we re-understand, or start to understand the nature of our thoughts, beliefs,knowledge, and patterns of thinking. We have the challenge before us. We need to not only ensure that these needs affects our movement from deficiency toward growth – what does this mean to you?

For more information about the Center of Self-Actualization Studies and the current work we are doing please visit our website www.cfsas.org.

Dr. Charles DesJardins