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Marriage Therapy: 8 Signs You Should See a Marriage Counselor - Dave Turo-Shields- ***Chris Brown Annoyed At Robin Roberts - by Submitted on Mar 22, 2011 from Teagin Maddox,This morning, March 22, 2011, Chris Brown made an appearance on Good Morning America to promote his new album F.A.M.E., which stands for “forgiving all my enemies,” he said. He quickly became uncomfortable and irritated by Robin Roberts as she interviewed him, barely probing into his past to ...
Views: 2674 - ***Conflict: Why Do You Argue, Why Do You Fight in Conflict? - by Submitted on Jan 03, 2009 from Margaret PaulThink about the last time you had a conflict with someone and you argued - with your partner, your friend, your parent, your child, or someone else in your life. What did you argue about, and why did you spend your energy arguing or fighting? Reasons for Arguing and Fighting Here are some of ...
Views: 3147 - ***Connecting With Loved Ones - by Submitted on Oct 16, 2008 from Margaret PaulAs social beings, our desire for connection is a deep and powerful force within us. Babies who do not experience connection with a caregiver do not thrive or may even die. Deep connection with another is one of the greatest joys in life. Yet for many people, this deep and joyous connection ...
Views: 2817 - ***Connection: Our Deepest Desire - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ We all deeply desire connection with others, but what is necessary for us to have this? ________________________________________ When we were born, the most important thing to us was connection with our mother. We needed connection with her body for ...
Views: 1447 - ***Controlling Behavior: Are Your Eyes On Your Partner's Plate? - by Submitted on Mar 15, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. March 14, 2016 _____________________________________________________________________________________ It is often tempting to tell others what to do, especially when it is obvious that they are not taking care of themselves. Discover why this usually backfires and what ...
Views: 1716 - ***Courage - by Submitted on May 20, 2015 from Margaret Paul___________________________________________________________________Do you have the courage to do the things you are afraid of, or do you allow fear to stop you?___________________________________________________________________ "I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the ...
Views: 1607 - ***Crazy Firemen's Dance - by Submitted on Feb 02, 2015 from Barbara SteppHow many times have you've heard someone say (not yourself, of course), "I'm angry"? When people identify themselves with an emotional response, this is not only ludicrous, inaccurate, and stupid; it's also extremely crappy hypnosis. When they do that, the deletions are there other than ...
Views: 3741 - ***Dating Advice: Five Ways to Cope with the Holidays - by Submitted on Sep 26, 2008 from Dr. Diana KirschnerRosh Hashanah is coming fast. Then there is Thanksgiving. Christmas. Hanukkah. Are you doomed to a miserable holiday if your relatives drive you crazy? What if you are just introducing your family to a serious date, someone who could be the One? Does Aunt Millie always cluck about what a ...
Views: 1417 - ***Dating Over 40: Why He's Not Asking You Out (Part 2) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerContinuing from yesterday, it's important to make yourself memorable when you are dating. There are tons of women out there; you want to be the one he wants to know. When you follow this advice and get your story out in the right way, the guys who are good matches will take notice. They are ...
Views: 2616 - ***Dating Over 40: Why He’s Not Asking You Out (Part 1) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerI can answer this in three words: You’re not memorable. That’s it. Whether it’s the hot man you had a nice chat with at the local coffee shop or the guy you had a great first date with, getting him to ask you out can take some skill. Yep, I said skill. You’re not 18 anymore, and the ...
Views: 2459 - ***Dating? (Exactly) What to Say to Men in Difficult Situations - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIn dating, good communication is the key to meeting and attracting men…especially the right men. It's also the key to developing and maintaining fulfilling relationships. One of the most important ways I support my coaching clients (www.datelikeagrownup.com/coaching) is by helping them ...
Views: 2353 - ***Developing The Habit Of Loving - by Submitted on Aug 18, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. Like anything worth learning, developing the habit of loving takes practice. As you practice Inner Bonding, your brain develops the habit of loving. "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." ~ Aristotle All of us develop ...
Views: 1258 - ***Do You Believe You Are Worthy of Love? - by Submitted on May 23, 2014 from Margaret PaulDo you sometimes find yourself resisting receiving love because you believe you don't deserve it? Have you ever heard yourself say, "I'm not worthy of love," or "I'm not worth loving," or "I'm unworthy of God's love"? I frequently hear this from my ...
Views: 1288 - ***Do You Compare Yourself to Others? - by Submitted on May 09, 2014 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ How often do you feel one-up or one-down in comparison to others? ________________________________________ When you were growing up, did your parents compare you to others? Were you compared to siblings or other family members? Did your parents ...
Views: 1155 - ***Do You Define Your Adequacy By Looks and/or Performance? - by Submitted on May 24, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ What was valued and approved of in your family as you were growing up? ________________________________________ When you were growing up, how did you learn to define your worth? Here are some of the things my clients have said to me: • In my ...
Views: 1302 - ***Do You Experience Life As A Burden Or As A Sacred Privilege? - by Submitted on Mar 24, 2015 from Margaret PaulLearn how to embrace life as the sacred privilege it is rather than be stuck just getting through. Peter experiences life as a burden - a sentence to get through that is filled with suffering. Peter trudges through his life, experiencing little joy. He works hard, makes enough money to feel ...
Views: 1539 - ***Do You Have Patience? - by Submitted on Oct 18, 2016 from Margaret PaulHas having patience been a challenge for you? Discover an underlying cause of impatience. Some people seem to be naturally patient. I'm not one of those people. I think I was born impatient. I have spent a lot of time cultivating having patience and trying to understand what triggers me ...
Views: 1209 - ***Do You Have Trouble Making Decisions? - by Submitted on Sep 09, 2014 from Margaret PaulDoes the fear of making a mistake immobilize you when you need to make a decision? Do you ever have trouble making decisions? Which rug to buy for your floor? Which couch to choose? What color to paint your walls? What you feel like doing on your days off? What kind of work you ...
Views: 1123 - ***Do You Long to Feel Significant? - by Submitted on Apr 07, 2017 from Tom KingA number of scholars and authors have written about our primary human needs. Perhaps the most well-known is Abraham Maslow who wrote about the hierarchy of needs. Another related framework that I find useful is described by Chloe Madanes in her book Relationship Breakthrough. This framework of ...
Views: 1716 - ***Do You Make People Up? - by Submitted on Oct 25, 2014 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. ________________________________________ Do you often see people as you want them to be rather than as they are? Has this caused you problems in your relationships? ________________________________________ “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” ...
Views: 1089 - ***Do You Put Pressure on Yourself? - by Submitted on Apr 25, 2014 from Margaret Paul______________________________________ Pressuring yourself might be causing resistance, stress, anxiety, physical pain, insomnia and even illness. ________________________________________ How many of you put a lot of pressure on yourself? How often do you feel anxious because of this ...
Views: 1383 - ***Do You Remember What You Say When You are Enraged? - by Submitted on Aug 15, 2014 from Margaret PaulDiscover why any kind of engaging when someone is angry is a waste of energy. "Rage can…shut off the hippocampus [linked to memory], and people with out-of-control anger may not be lying when they say they don't recall what they said or did in that altered state of ...
Views: 1115 - ***Do You See The Obstacle Or The Goal? - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Where does your mind generally go - to the obstacles or to the goal? You CAN change your mindset if it is stopping you from having what you want. ________________________________________ Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your ...
Views: 1847 - ***Do You See Your Essence and The Essences of Your Children? - by Submitted on Jun 25, 2015 from Margaret PaulDo you really see your children? If you operate from core shame and cannot see the beauty of your own essence, your children will not feel seen by you. Yet they need to be seen by you to truly value themselves. ________________________________________ One of the things I loved doing as a ...
Views: 1526 - ***Do you want to complain or to heal? - by Submitted on Sep 06, 2008 from Rose RosetreeFollowing yesterday’s discussion of narcissists (posted here at Self-Growth under auras), one of our Blog-Buddies — Lisa — wrote this as part of her comment: "Rose has recently done some spiritual healing work for me and cut a cord of attachment to someone who was also very ...
Views: 4267 - ***Does Controlling Others Make You Feel Happy? - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2013 from Margaret PaulAre you aware of the feelings you cause yourself when you attempt to control others rather than love yourself? "I have never been able to conceive how any rational being could propose happiness to himself from the exercise of power over others." - Thomas ...
Views: 1264 - ***Does Your Life Feel Alive And Meaningful? - by Submitted on Jun 20, 2016 from Margaret PaulDo you find that nothing really excites you or holds much meaning for you? Does your life lack aliveness, passion and purpose? Vera sought out counseling with me because her doctor advised her to discover the emotional causes of her chronic fatigue. Vera, a successful stockbroker, was in a ...
Views: 1274 - ***Does Your Morning Routine Support Your Creativity? - by Submitted on May 25, 2012 from Margaret PaulHave you decided that you are not creative? Do you feel a deadness regarding creativity? “Everything about the way we start our day runs counter to the best conditions for thinking creatively,” wrote Annie Murphy Paul in an article entitled “Why Morning Routines Are Creativity Killers.” ...
Views: 1959 - ***Does Your Partner Judge You In Front Of Others? - by Submitted on Apr 08, 2014 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you get stuck not knowing what to say or do when your partner treats you disrespectfully? ________________________________________ Louise asked me: "Do you have any suggestions on what to say when my husband says unloving words to me in front ...
Views: 1201 - ***Embracing Panic - by Submitted on Jul 03, 2014 from Margaret PaulDiscover how to manage panic in a way that allows it to dissipate rather than escalate. "That's the strange thing about panic – when we lean into it, it loosens it's grip on us." Daniel Siegel, M.D. "The power of reflection allows us to approach, rather than ...
Views: 1245 - ***Feeling Disconnected From Your Partner? - by Submitted on Aug 09, 2011 from Margaret Paul"We can't seem to connect anymore."This is one of the most common complaints I hear in my counseling practice.We all know that it is generally easy to connect at the beginning of a relationship - before all the protections and defenses come up. But what do you do to reconnect once you ...
Views: 5980 - ***Finally! Studies Prove That Spanking Doesn’t Work - by Submitted on May 03, 2012 from Margaret Paul“A new analysis concludes that spanking fails to alter kids' behavior in the long term. What it does instead is amp up their aggression.” From “Why Spanking Doesn’t Work,” by Bonnie Rochman |@brochman | February 6, 2012 http://healthland.time.com/2012/02/06/why-spanking-doesnt-work/?hpt=hp_t3 ...
Views: 3096 - ***Find your Genius - by Submitted on Jun 07, 2012 from Margaret PaulWe are all geniuses. Are you ready to find your genius? “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” ~ Albert Einstein Did you know that everybody is a genius? I love this quote by Einstein because ...
Views: 3399 - ***Finding The Partner Of My Dreams - by Submitted on Jan 25, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you seeking the formula for attracting the partner of your dreams? Here it is! ________________________________________ Rochelle asks: "If I assess myself quite objectively, if I know my accomplishments as well as my drawbacks, is there a ...
Views: 1302 - ***First-Date Blues – What Can you Learn? - by Submitted on Dec 06, 2013 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Dating is challenging for many. Here are some tips to turn it into a learning adventure. ________________________________________ Sometimes, dating can be discouraging, or it can be a learning experience. One of the things I encourage my dating ...
Views: 2752 - ***Friendship: Connection or Neediness? - by Submitted on May 02, 2014 from Margaret PaulDo you have problems having truly connected friendships? Friendship is a big topic. There are people who always seem to have many friends, and others who can't seem to find the way to make friends. Some people have deeply connected friendships, and others have only superficial ...
Views: 1258 - ***Getting Out of The Negative Relationship Cycle - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2013 from Margaret PaulShould you leave a relationship that is stuck in a negative cycle? It is quite common for me to work with clients who are stuck in a dysfunctional relationship cycle. Sarah describes a common cycle that she wants to resolve: "I am stuck in a two year uncommitted ...
Views: 1673 - ***Getting Your Point Across - by Submitted on May 27, 2015 from Margaret PaulWhat happens in your relationships when you try to get your point across to someone who isn't open to your point of view? ________________________________________ One of the situations that often creates relationship conflict is when you become devoted to getting your point across. Most ...
Views: 1813 - ***Giving Up the Fantasy of the Perfect Mate, What REAL Marriages Are All About - by Submitted on Sep 14, 2012 from Sharon RivkinWe all seem to think that we need to find our perfect mate or soul mate. But does a perfect mate even exist and, if so, does this mean that the only way to be happy is to find this perfect soul mate? What if you don’t? What if you spend your entire life looking, only to end up alone in your ...
Views: 2602 - ***Greed - by Submitted on Feb 24, 2015 from Margaret PaulGreed is wreaking havoc on our planet. "We are in danger of destroying ourselves by our greed and stupidity." ~Stephen Hawking "In a country well-governed, poverty is something to be ashamed of. In a country badly governed, wealth is something to be ashamed of." ~ Confucius What Causes ...
Views: 1592 - ***Have an Amazing First Date: Success Tips and Strategies - by Submitted on Jun 02, 2016 from Valeria ChubaAre you currently dating, or about to start dating? Then you absolutely need to listen to this new episode of the Get Sex-Smart podcast. Dr. Valeria Chuba and sex coach Sarah Martin share expert tips and strategies on how to have a great first date. This includes: choosing the right location for ...
Views: 8690 - ***Have You Fallen Out of Love With Your Partner? - by Submitted on Aug 03, 2012 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are you contemplating leaving your partner because you have fallen out of love? Read this first! ________________________________________ We have only to look at the divorce rate—41% for first marriages, 60% for second marriages, and a whopping 73% ...
Views: 2729 - ***Healing Attachment Wounds - by Submitted on Sep 01, 2015 from Margaret PaulInner Bonding is a powerful process for healing attachment wounds. Did you have a secure, reliable loving bond with at least one parent or caregiver? Was one of your parents or caregivers consistently emotionally available and responsive to your needs? If not, then you likely have attachment ...
Views: 1634 - ***Healing Celebration Anxiety - by Submitted on Jan 17, 2014 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Are the holidays a joy for you or do you dread them? Are you ready to heal your celebration anxiety? ________________________________________ What were celebrations like in your home? Were they fun, connected family times that you looked forward to, ...
Views: 1684 - ***Healing From A Relationship With A Narcissist - by Submitted on Apr 25, 2016 from Margaret PaulBy Margaret Paul, Ph.D. April 25, 2016 ________________________________________ Healing from a relationship with a narcissist is a learned process. Learn it now! ________________________________________ Many of us have been there. You met the person of your dreams – charming, ...
Views: 1703 - ***Healing From Infidelity - by Submitted on Feb 14, 2013 from Margaret PaulInfidelity is a huge challenge, but relationships can heal from this and actually become stronger. Sheldon wrote this question to me during one of my free webinars: "I am trying to repair my 20-year marriage after my infidelity. I was discovered by my wife two years ago. I ...
Views: 1558 - ***Healing Love Addiction Within a Relationship - by Submitted on Jul 19, 2013 from Margaret PaulRelationships can provide a wonderful arena for healing love addiction. Many relationships flounder due to the issue of love addiction. Since people come together at their common level of woundedness – i.e., their common level of self-abandonment – if one partner is love ...
Views: 1630 - ***Healing the Mother Wound - by Submitted on Sep 30, 2015 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Do you have a mother wound that plagues you in your life and your relationships? ________________________________________ Many of us have a deep and painful mother wound from not receiving the nurturing we needed. Without adequate healing, this ...
Views: 1583 - ***Healing Your Inner Cult - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2015 from Margaret Paul________________________________________ Heal your inner cult with the Six Steps of Inner Bonding. _______________________________________ What do you picture when you think of the word 'cult?' For me, what comes to mind is being involved in a community where you have to follow certain ...
Views: 1310 - ***How Are You and Your Partner Doing Together? - by Submitted on Apr 15, 2015 from Margaret PaulHow is your relationship with your partner? What are the positive and negative aspects of your relationship? What are the positive and negative aspects of your relationship? When you and your partner are both operating as loving adults, you will experience many positive results. When one ...
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