Listening is usually identified as a positive personality trait. It can be seen as a virtue and a sign of generosity and wisdom, which may place listeners at high regard in front of other people. Therefore, many individuals may not hesitate to say they are good listeners, but may do so when confessing they are good talkers.
Listening may seem like an easy process, but active or power listening is a specialized skill, which can be acquired through the intentional training of oneself to focus on what is and isn't being said. A Certified Professional Coach practices power listening through actively listening to his clients.
One can enhance their powerful listening skills over time by attempting to increase the number of seconds, for which one can stay focused. One of the ways to practice this skill is through counting to 50 silently. If we can try to maintain our counting progress for that period of time, we have practiced the skill of power listening for almost one minute. Now this may seem like a short amount of time but in a conversation this can be quite a long one.
One of the key areas of becoming a power/ active listener is to determine whether you value this skill or not. If we ask ourselves whether it is important enough to spend much of our time listening to what other people say, and whether anything they say may offer any benefit to our life. Can we really listen to someone if we can't directly see the connection between what they are saying and whether it holds any value to us.
By practicing this powerful skill regularly, we allow it to be part of our conscious thinking process, and we will start to become more aware of how we often listen to others. We may start to observe ourselves in conversations.
Jumping in too early is a guilt trap many people may fall in, but the good news is that we can acquire and develop our skills in listening and trying to understand what the other person is saying and how they are linking things in their own logic.
A good coach is one who listens well, and makes their client feel valued and relieved, through sharing their thoughts and feelings with their coach. That can make clients feel at ease to realize their problems should not take control of them, and that solutions are possible through the voluntary interaction between coach and client.
A good coach discerns what is truly motivating, triggering and inspiring a client, and becomes part of his joy, sadness, and celebrations. A coach's main focus while listening is to understand what inspires the client and what obstacles stand in the way of realizing this inspiration.
Finally, coaches can try to listen to what the client is not saying, i.e. read between the lines.Non-verbal communication plays a large role in communication. Therefore, not everything we say means what we really want to say.
Active Listening is a skill when refined to a professional level can open the door to a speaker's internal wisdom. Empathy is the window for that interaction between speaker and listener. Therefore, being actively present for their clients, coaches try their best to focus mainly on what their client really wants to say.
Everyone needs a coach, why not try it for yourself.
Razan Z. Kilani is a passionate Emotional Intelligence & Transformational Coach and Change Agent. She is the Owner of Wisdom Within Consultancy and Wisdom Within Coaching.
Prior to working as a Professional Coach, Razan had worked in background in Public Relations, the Media, Copyrighting, Advertising and Marketing. She is committed to making a difference in people's lives through partnering with them on a life-changing journey. Her coaching work centers around heightening client's awareness around their lives, finding their voice, encouraging self-discovery, tuning in to their inner wisdom, and becoming aware of their responsibility in their lives, and the choices they are making, and whether or not they are supporting them to achieve their goals or leading them to self-sabotage.
Razan has given workshops targeting different topics: Self-Help (e.g. Stress Management, Self-Motivation, Effective Communication, Quality Relationships, Dealing with Teenage Children, Teacher-Student Communication, Surviving Ordeals like Cancer, etc.) and key corporate problems, like employees' lack of motivation, poor management, client satisfaction, and leadership.
Razan has a Master’s degree in the Media and Cultural Studies (England) and speak four languages (English, Arabic, Spanish and French)as she has been exposed to international cultures all her life.
Wisdom Within Consultancy/ Wisdom Within Coaching (WWC) is a starting place for anyone seeking light in their day-to-day journey. Backed by solid knowledge, effective coaching tools and experience, WWC takes you on a self-discovery journey to support you to become whoever you 'really' want to be, and do whatever you wish to be doing in life; i.e. we take you to where you want to wake up every morning feeling energized, fulfilled and highly confident.