I heard from a wife who was seemingly at the end of her rope. She described her marriage as "unloving" and said that very recently, there had begun to be a lot of tension in their home. When the affection started to wane, she didn't worry too much about it because she knew that it could be ... Views: 626
I sometimes hear from wives who feel quite criticized and unaccepted by their husbands. One of the common complaints is that the wife "no longer makes an effort" or "has let herself go." I fully admit that I often side with the wives on this topic. Because I've been on the receiving end of this ... Views: 625
Many wives who contact me are going through some serious turmoil within their marriage. Some are just beginning a separation and some have even been served with divorce papers. Others just know that their marriage is in serious trouble. Despite all of the drama going on their lives, many of ... Views: 625
Many wives are very disappointed in the way that their husband is acting during a trial or marital separation. Often, the wives had hoped that the time apart would actually improve both people's behavior. But, much to their dismay, the opposite has happened.
One might say: "things weren't ... Views: 623
It's not uncommon for people facing a trial separation to seek out statistics on the same. It's normal to want to know what you are up against. People want to know if separation is usually a precursor to divorce or if the process actually helps most of the couples who attempt it.
Before I go ... Views: 621
I often write about saving marriages. Yet, I get a lot of emails from wives who are afraid that their husband's lack of affection and verbal and non-verbal reassurance is a sign that their husband has "fallen out of love" with them, has checked out of the marriage, or that severe marital ... Views: 621
I sometimes hear from people who aren't sure how much more work they can put into their marriage. Often, they feel as if they have been working for a long and difficult time, although they have little to show for it. And many times, they are disappointed that they are not seeing any real change ... Views: 620
I write about saving and rescuing marriages. As a result, I sometimes receive emails from folks wanting to know why their marriages are ending and what they can do to stop, delay, or bypass this process. Often, when I ask why the marriage is in trouble, I get a range of about five different ... Views: 618
By the time most people get around to emailing me, their marriage has typically been in trouble for a while. It's so easy to just ignore the problem and hope that it will go away until it reaches a point where you can no longer do that. It's often only then that folks will sit down, roll up ... Views: 616
I sometimes hear from people who just aren't sure if they are truly ready to walk away from their spouse and their marriage. Sometimes, they themselves are the ones who initiated the separation, divorce, or thoughts of giving up. Other times, they are responding to (and are at the mercy of) a ... Views: 615
I sometimes hear from people who are dealing with a spouse who has become cold, distant, and "confused." People are sometimes quick to label this as a mid-life crisis, but it can happen at any point in a person's life. Typically what you will see is that your spouse will suddenly no longer feel ... Views: 614
If you're researching how to win your husband back, then you are probably where I was a few years ago - either your marriage isn't as stable as you'd like, or your husband has mentioned leaving or divorcing, or you feel that you're relationship is headed in a dangerous direction. I have no way ... Views: 612
I often write about how I was able to save my own marriage when it was on its last legs, so I am sometimes approached my wives in a similar situation. Recently, I've been asked for advice or tips on topics like "how can I get my husband to love me again," or "my husband detaches from me," or "my ... Views: 610
I sometimes hear from wives whose husband is telling them that he isn't ready to come home or commit to the marriage because he fears that he's done something that has hurt her or his marriage too much.
I might hear: “my husband left home about six weeks ago. He admitted to having an affair ... Views: 610
I sometimes get correspondence from people who confess that their marriage has been "unhappy," "stale," or "unfulfilling" for quite a while. And, most have hung in there because they had hoped things would get better or because they were opposed to a separation or divorce. But after a while of ... Views: 604
I sometimes hear from wives who are struggling with the reasoning that their husband is using for pursuing distance, a break, or a marital separation. Sometimes, the husband will try to tell the wife that the feelings are no longer there, if they were ever there in the first place. This can be ... Views: 600
I often hear from wives who have been fed the "I love you but I'm not in love with you" line that many husbands will give when they aren't sure if they want to be married anymore. This is a very common topic that comes up time and time again. Many of the wives have trouble understanding what ... Views: 599
The majority of wives who visit this blog desperately want to save their marriages but feel that they are the only ones who want to. So often, I get emails that go something like: "Help! I want to save my marriage, but my husband doesn't. How can I prevent a divorce when I'm the only one who ... Views: 598
I often hear from panicked wives whose husbands have just or recently told them that he wants a separation. For many wives, the "s word" is often akin to proclaiming that the marriage is most definitely over, at least in her eyes. Many people associate a separation with an eventual divorce and ... Views: 597
A couple of days ago, I received an email from a wife who had been married for well over a decade. She shared with me that, over the last couple of years, she has felt her husband slipping away. She told me that her husband " spends less time at home, doesn't show me nearly as much affection, ... Views: 597
I often hear from people (usually wives) who would very much like to save their marriage while they are separated, but they wonder if this will be possible because they suspect (or know for sure) that their husband is seeing someone else. It's hard enough to save your marriage together as a ... Views: 597
I'm often contacted by panicked wives who tell me that their husband is pushing for a trial separation and they want to know how to change his mind before he walks out the door. Their thinking is that, once their husband has actually left, it's going to be harder to get him to come back than it ... Views: 596
Most of the wives who write to or reach out to me are trying very hard to get their separated husband to come home. Many fantasize about this for some time. So when it finally happens and their husband indicates that he would be open to a reconciliation, you would think that they would be ... Views: 596
There are certain behaviors that wives start to notice when they suspect that their husband has begun to check out of their marriage. One example is when he is no longer interested in making sure that the home runs smoothly. Perhaps he used to take an interest in household maintenance (even if ... Views: 596
I often get emails from wives who feel that their husbands either don't love them enough or don't love them at all. I hear comments like "he doesn't love me nearly as much as I love him," or "I love him very much, but he doesn't love me back," or "if only it was enough that I adore him, but he ... Views: 595
I sometimes hear from wives who are desperate for some sort of plan to make their husbands stay with them. Often, the husband has suggested a break, separation, or divorce. This is usually the last thing that the wives who write to me want.
A wife might say, in part: "I would do absolutely ... Views: 594
It's common for me to hear from people who are dealing with an unhappy spouse or an unhappy marriage. Rebuilding contentment in your marriage is challenging enough, but the challenge can feel insurmountable when your spouse expresses doubt about your ability to be a happy couple going forward. ... Views: 593
I often hear from people who don't feel completely appreciated by their spouse. And, this complaint can come from both a husband and a wife. It is not limited to one particular sex or gender. However, I find that women tend to feel unappreciated a bit more since household and child-rearing ... Views: 593
The vast majority of people that I hear from do not feel understood or heard by their spouse. I find that many folks do not comprehend just how serious of a problem this might be. Sure, no one is perfect at communicating or at reading someone else's clues. And sure, all marriages can ... Views: 591
Since I often write about saving marriages, regaining the love and spark in your marriage, and restoring intimacy and closeness, I'm often asked what is the best way to react or proceed when you know that you husband wants to leave. The answer to this will greatly depend upon the situation, but ... Views: 591
I often hear from frustrated wives (and sometimes husbands too) who are at their wit's end or at a crossroads in their marriage. Typically, the marriage is in real trouble and the wife has done seemingly everything in her power to save it, but nothing seems to be working. I'll often get comments ... Views: 588
Sometimes, when you are reluctantly separated from your spouse, hearing the words "I love you," can make you feel as if you have won the lottery. After all, when you never wanted the separation in the first place, you are looking for anything that might give you hope that one day, the separation ... Views: 585
Many wives are crushed that their husband will not agree to a reconciliation. Sometimes, they are separated. And other times, they are just living separate lives within the same house. Often, the wives aren't sure how to best address this, especially when the two seem so far apart, with no ... Views: 584
Many of the women who visit my blog can literally feel their husband or their boyfriend slipping away from them. The distance is a feeling that has become so real that you can almost touch it. I often hear things like "our relationship today is just so different. He's cold, indifferent, and ... Views: 584
I recently heard from a wife who wasn't sure why she felt the way that she did. Her husband of five years had decided that he wasn't happy being married and he felt that he should explore life on his own to see if it would make him happier. He didn't give the wife much warning about this. He ... Views: 583
I get a lot of correspondence from spouses (who are usually wives) that admit to me that they are "only staying married for the sake of the children." These wives often admit that they are quite unhappy and they worry that their lack of passion for life is going to influence or negatively affect ... Views: 583
Perhaps your spouse is only frustrated in the marriage. Perhaps he or she has taken it further already asked for a divorce or break. Maybe you've simply made a mistake and want to ask your husband and wife for forgiveness, to start over, or for another chance. Whatever your circumstances, I ... Views: 582
It would be nice if reconciling a marriage was an easy task, with both parties committed and confident that it is possible to work things out. But, this isn't always the case. Most people who visit my site are wives (and sometimes husbands) who are either trying to save the marriage alone, or ... Views: 581
I often receive comments and emails from wives who tell me that their husband is claiming that he wants a divorce, and the wives want to know if this means the end of the marriage. The answer to this question is going to greatly depend upon the circumstances around it, but I believe that until ... Views: 579
I often hear from wives who are scrambling to come up with the best course of action after their husband tells them that he wants a divorce. Many of them are looking for a way to make their husbands either regret the decision to divorce or to see that it is the wrong decision in the first ... Views: 579
Most people who value their marriage see their spouse leaving them, initiating a separation, or filing for divorce as the worst-case scenario. No one wants to be abandoned by their spouse or unsure about the future of their marriage. And, if you think that any of these things are possible, then ... Views: 578
Family can be a huge contributing factor in whether you attempt to save your marriage or not. Many people confess to me that were it not for their children, the decision of whether or not to end their marriage would probably be a lot easier. Children can even factor into the equation once the ... Views: 577
I sometimes hear from spouses who realize that it's important to give their spouse some space during the trial separation. Many are also fully aware that this time is best used for working on themselves and for allowing the distance to create a longing for one another so that their marriage ... Views: 577
I received an email from a very frustrated and confused wife who told me that her marriage was falling apart and she had no idea how to proceed because everything that she tried only seemed to make things worse. She'd tried confronting the problem head-on. She'd tried having a deep, heart to ... Views: 573
I sometimes hear from people who are looking for the perfect words to say in order to finally get through to the spouse who wants a divorce. Often, they know that this conversation is going to be a last-ditch effort, especially since they have had trouble getting through to their spouse in the ... Views: 569
The following tips may seem counterintuitive at times, but please bear with me. They are based on my personal experience and the endless research I conducted when I was trying to save my own marriage. Your success will depend on how well you play them and the state of your relationship today, ... Views: 566
Although no one can really answer this question for you, I hope to give you insights on what has worked for me and others. Through my own experience and research, I've developed a theory on what will make a husband stay and what will drive him further away. It is my opinion that "chasing a ... Views: 565
If you're thinking about this phrase or asking the questions that stem from it, then it's probably safe to say the state of your marriage isn't as strong or as stable as you would like it to be. I don't know the specifics of your situation, or whether your spouse is just not as happy as he could ... Views: 565
If you're researching this question, I'm assuming that your marriage is not on firm ground or is in trouble. I don't know if you're contemplating divorce, already taking a break from the relationship, or just wanting to improve upon what you already have. No matter which situation you're in, ... Views: 565
Family can be a huge contributing factor in whether you attempt to save your marriage or not. Many people confess to me that were it not for their children, the decision of whether or not to end their marriage would probably be a lot easier. Children can even factor into the equation once the ... Views: 564