Self Improvement Site
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
Articles from Leslie Cane | Selfgrowth.com
- My Husband Never Initiates Affection: Why Wouldn't A Husband Want To Show His Wife Affection? - by Submitted on May 06, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often hear from married folks who are quite distressed by the lack of affection in their marriage. Many want to understand why this pattern may exist so that they can come up with a plan to change it. A wife might say: "for the last five years or so, my husband hasn't wanted to show me ...
Views: 762 - My Husband Never Takes My Side, Defends Me, Or Has My Back. It Hurts Me And Makes Me Doubt My Marriage. - by Submitted on Apr 26, 2020 from Leslie CaneIn a good marriage, we would do just about anything for our spouse. A marriage is a relationship where, ideally, you would go to war for your spouse if you had to. People who are happily married generally have the outlook that they and their spouse are a pack of two and that they will defend ...
Views: 1089 - My Husband Puts His Friends Ahead Of Me. He Does Not Fully Meet His Commitments To Me Or Honor Our Marriage Vows - by Submitted on May 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneIt's not uncommon for me to hear from people who have discovered that their marriage hasn't turned out how they thought that it would. Many see this as a negative thing because they perceive that their spouse is falling short in some way. And many feel as if their spouse isn't meeting his or her ...
Views: 642 - My Husband Refuses To Change. He Tells Me What I Want To Hear But Nothing Ever Changes - by Submitted on May 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany people are pretty clear about what they need from their spouses in order to be happy in their marriage. And sometimes, the more unhappy you are in your marriage, the more you spell this out for your spouse. That's why it can be very frustrating when your spouse assures you that you are ...
Views: 697 - My Husband Refuses To Grow Up. He Claims He'll Change And Act Like An Adult To Save Our Marriage, But I've Heard It Before - by Submitted on May 07, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany people are skeptical about their spouse's claims that they will make drastic changes in order to save their marriage. Often, this whole speech sounds very familiar because they have heard it all before. And this leaves them with more doubt than confidence. A wife might complain: "For the ...
Views: 1346 - My Husband Refuses To Work On Your Marriage. He Thinks That He Should Not Have to "Work" At A Relationship - Tips and Advice That May Help - by Submitted on May 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneOver the holiday weekend, I got an email from a wife who was asking for my advice on getting her husband's cooperation in helping to improve and save their marriage. She wrote, in part: "my husband feels that a marriage shouldn't be work -- that if two people are compatible and are a good match ...
Views: 725 - My Husband Sabotages My Happiness: He Could Care Less Whether I'm Happy Or Not. - by Submitted on May 06, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from folks who think that things are lopsided in their marriage. One example is the spouse who thinks that although she values her husband's happiness above her own, he doesn't return the favor. And over time, she has come to believe that he could care less whether her happiness ...
Views: 857 - My Husband Says He Doesn't Care If I Leave Because We're Not Happy. I Guess He Tried To Call My Bluff - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2020 from Leslie CaneIn certain circumstances, I do not find it unusual for married couples to threaten the very thing that they fear the most. In other words, it is not uncommon for a wife who dreads a separation to threaten that very thing in order to get her husband to reassure her that there will be NO ...
Views: 841 - My Husband Says He Doesn't Love Me Anymore and Wants a Divorce - How Do I Cope With This? - by Submitted on May 05, 2020 from Leslie CaneI recently heard from a wife who was devastated and not sure that she could cope. Her husband had just dropped a huge bombshell when he announced that he no longer loved her and wanted a divorce. She was highly emotional, understandably, and she didn't know how to begin to process this (much ...
Views: 754 - My Husband Says He Loves Me But He's Leaving Because He Wants Time Away From Me - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often hear from wives who are dealing with a husband who is expressing his unhappiness with their marriage. Sometimes, he even takes this a step further and begins to speak of a separation or divorce. At that point, the wife will ask questions to determine why he might be doing this. One ...
Views: 763 - My Husband Says He Wants To See Where Our Relationship Leads As Friends - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2020 from Leslie CaneOne thing that frustrates many wives who are newly separated or taking a husband initiated "break" from their marriage is the husband's lack of clarity about how things are going to work. The wife often wishes that he could be specific about how things are going to unfold in the days and weeks ...
Views: 550 - My Husband Says He's Leaving Me "To Think." What In The World Does He Need To Think About? - by Submitted on Apr 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from wives whose husband has left them "because he needs some time to think." That's pretty much the extent of what he tells the wife. Rarely does he go a little deeper and offer up an explanation as to just what "thinking" actually means. Understandably, the wives are not ...
Views: 550 - My Husband Says He's Not Happy And Wants To Leave. He Feels He'd Be Happier Without Me. What Do I Do? - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2020 from Leslie CaneIn some matters, it feels as if it almost pays to be naive or in the dark - at least where your marriage is concerned. Because some knowledge can never be unlearned once you learn it. And when it is something that is very hurtful - like your spouse being unhappy or considering a separation or ...
Views: 636 - My Husband Says It's Too Little Too Late To Save Our Marriage. How Do I Change His Mind? - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from wives who are desperately trying to convince their husbands that it's possible to save their marriage. Sometimes, the husband remains firm in his belief that the marriage is too far gone to save. I recently heard from a wife in this situation. She said, in part: "I'm pretty ...
Views: 1132 - My Husband Says Our Marriage Is Not What He Wants Anymore And Insists He Won't Change His Mind. What Now? - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2020 from Leslie CaneKnowing the couple I'm about to describe as I already do, I can pretty much picture the scene in my mind. And since I myself went through the same scene in what seems like another lifetime ago, I've felt what I know that the wife is feeling right now. I can literally not only see what probably ...
Views: 640 - My Husband Says That He Feels Neglected And That I Never Listen To Him So He Isn't Sure About Our Marriage - by Submitted on May 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneIt is difficult to listen to your spouse complain about a flaw that he sees within you. This is especially true if you disagree about the severity of the flaw and have trouble controlling it. Most of the time, this is a reoccurring frustration. However, sometimes this issue escalates to the ...
Views: 750 - My Husband Served Me With Divorce Papers, But I Want to Save the Marriage - Advice That May Help - by Submitted on Apr 16, 2020 from Leslie CaneThere are few worse feelings than being served with divorce papers when you want to save your marriage. It's absolutely normal to feel panicked and beaten. But, it's important to understand that it doesn't have to be "the end." Many marriages reconcile before the divorce is final. It's not an ...
Views: 732 - My Husband Straight Up Told Me He Doesn't Love Me Anymore - by Submitted on May 04, 2020 from Leslie CaneI recently heard from a wife who recently had a very upsetting exchange with her husband. They had recently exchanged some pretty heated words and the husband threw up his hands and said their whole marriage was a "farce and a joke." This stopped the wife cold in her tracks because normally when ...
Views: 1009 - My Husband Takes Me (And Our Marriage) For Granted: He Alway Says He Will Work On Our Marriage But Then He Doesn't Do A Thing - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2020 from Leslie CaneIt can get very frustrating when you've become dissatisfied with your marriage, but are also very unhappy with your spouse's attempt to resolve it. His complacency can make you feel as if he is taking you (and the marriage) for granted. You may get up your courage to tell him that this just ...
Views: 628 - My Husband Wants A Divorce, But Still Wants To Have Sex. How To Evaluate If It's Right To Continue Having Sex - by Submitted on Apr 18, 2020 from Leslie CaneThis question is actually more common than you may think. When couples are in crisis or are in talks about taking a break, splitting up, or divorcing, emotions can run high and doubt can creep in. Affection, attraction, and love can still be smoldering under the surface even if a couple is ...
Views: 642 - My Husband Wants Me Out Of The House. Sometimes I Feel Like My Husband Acts Rude To Get Me To Leave Him. But I Don't Want To Leave My Home. - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2020 from Leslie CaneOften, there's a period of time in your marriage where you know that a separation could be just around the corner. During this time period, you and your husband can kind of circle one another. Both parties can feel that one of them is going to make the move to leave. The question is WHO it is ...
Views: 513 - My Husband Wants Out. Should I Let Him Go? - by Submitted on Apr 14, 2020 from Leslie CaneI am asked this question a lot. Most times, I find that the person asking it doesn't really want to let her husband go (deep down) and wants to know something else. What most people are asking is: "Can one person save a relationship?" or "Can I change my husband's mind and save the marriage?" In ...
Views: 773 - My Husband Wants to Leave - Should I Chase Him? Why Should LURE Him, Not Chase Him - by Submitted on Apr 18, 2020 from Leslie CaneAlthough no one can really answer this question for you, I hope to give you insights on what has worked for me and others. Through my own experience and research, I've developed a theory on what will make a husband stay and what will drive him further away. It is my opinion that "chasing a ...
Views: 553 - My Husband Wants To Leave Me But I Still Love Him. What Can I Do? - by Submitted on May 05, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from wives who are fairly certain that their husband is going to leave them. Some of them just have a strong feeling or suspicion that their husband is unhappy. Others have husbands who have been very honest about the fact that he is considering moving out. Many of the wives do ...
Views: 719 - My Husband Wants to Leave Me: Understanding What Situations Create Runaway Husbands And Which Tactics To Use - by Submitted on Apr 18, 2020 from Leslie CaneSince I often write about saving marriages, regaining the love and spark in your marriage, and restoring intimacy and closeness, I'm often asked what is the best way to react or proceed when you know that you husband wants to leave. The answer to this will greatly depend upon the situation, but ...
Views: 580 - My Husband Will Leave Me If Something Doesn't Change Soon. I'm Running Out Of Time To Save My Marriage. - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from folks who feel as if they are running out of time to save their marriage. And they typically feel this way because their spouse has made it clear that he is getting very impatient. Some spouses go so far as to threaten divorce or separation if something doesn't change very ...
Views: 784 - My Husband Will Not Even Talk About Saving Our Marriage. And He Won't Listen Either - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often hear from wives who want to know how to broach the conversation about saving their marriage. And, they want to make sure that when they are having this discussion, their husband is agreeable to what they are saying. No one wants to feel as though they're speaking to a brick wall. Some ...
Views: 520 - My Husband Will Not Talk To Me After We Had A Fight And He Left. How Can I Save My Marriage When He's Giving Me The Silent Treatment? - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from folks who want more than anything to have a chance to save their marriage, especially when they perceive that the issues within that same marriage are all of their faults. However, sometimes not only is the issue that has threatened the marriage difficult to overcome, but ...
Views: 649 - My Husband Won't Fight For Me. Why Won't He Step Up And Fight For Our Marriage? - by Submitted on May 13, 2020 from Leslie CaneAdmittedly, not everyone who tells their spouse that they want them to leave, take a break, or pursue a trial separation is telling the absolute truth. In fact, many spouses will make these claims simply because they want to get their spouse's attention or they are trying to get their spouse to ...
Views: 1157 - My Husband Won't Say Why He Left Me. - by Submitted on Apr 18, 2020 from Leslie CaneI recently heard from a wife who just wasn't sure what to do. Her husband had left her and the home the week before and now was not accepting her calls, texts, or emails. Anytime that she did get him on the phone, placed herself in front of him, and had his attention for long enough to get a ...
Views: 629 - My Husband's Heart Is Hardened Toward Me. Can My Heartfelt Words Get My Husband To Change His Mind About The Divorce? - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from people who are looking for the perfect words to say in order to finally get through to the spouse who wants a divorce. Often, they know that this conversation is going to be a last-ditch effort, especially since they have had trouble getting through to their spouse in the ...
Views: 560 - My Husband's Job Loss (And The Stress From It) Is Hurting Our Marriage So Bad We Might Be Headed For Separation Or Divorce - by Submitted on May 13, 2020 from Leslie CaneI've started to get a lot of emails from people whose spouses have lost their jobs in today's economy. Often, this eventually puts a huge strain on the marriage even if the couple had a very strong relationship before the job loss. Even when the spouse who is still working is quite supportive, ...
Views: 2050 - My Marriage Is Dead. How Do I Know If I Need To Leave My Failing Marriage And Move On? Here's Some Questions To Ask Yourself - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2020 from Leslie CaneSome spouses feel as though they might be at crossroads in their marriage. They typically aren't quite as happy as they might like, or they are experiencing problems within the marriage that are causing a great deal of stress. Because of this, they wonder if it is time to just let their ...
Views: 728 - My Marriage is Falling Apart - Advice That May Help - by Submitted on Apr 16, 2020 from Leslie CaneI received an email from a very frustrated and confused wife who told me that her marriage was falling apart and she had no idea how to proceed because everything that she tried only seemed to make things worse. She'd tried confronting the problem head-on. She'd tried having a deep, heart to ...
Views: 565 - My Separated Husband Came Home To See If The Spark Would Come Back. He Says It Hasn't. What Now? - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2020 from Leslie CaneOften, when you are separated, your greatest obstacle seems to be getting your separated husband to be willing to come back home. Many wives hope that if they can just find a way to overcome this obstacle, then things will just fall back into place once he returns home where he belongs. But what ...
Views: 548 - My Separated Husband Demands Space, But I Feel Like A Liar When I Hide And Fight My True Feelings. - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from spouses who realize that it's important to give their spouse some space during the trial separation. Many are also fully aware that this time is best used for working on themselves and for allowing the distance to create a longing for one another so that their marriage ...
Views: 565 - My Separated Husband Has Said Mean, Hurtful Things That I Can't Get Over. How Can I Even Begin To Save My Marriage After These Unforgivable Comments? - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2020 from Leslie CaneSaving your marriage with two willing people can feel daunting and overwhelming at times. But saving your marriage when one spouse is not participating and has said very hurtful things can feel downright impossible. A wife might be dealing with a marriage in which both parties have said ...
Views: 924 - My Separated Husband Is Nice To Everyone Except Me. Why? - by Submitted on Apr 08, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany separated wives notice a transformation in their separated husband. They can't deny that he's actually a more pleasant person than he was before the separation. This would almost seem like a positive transformation - if the wife herself could enjoy it. You see, often the wife can't help but ...
Views: 785 - My Separated Husband Lies And Hides Things From Me. Why Won't He Just Be Truthful? How Hard Is It To Just Tell The Truth? - by Submitted on May 12, 2020 from Leslie CaneWhen your spouse pursues a separation, it's natural to be concerned about his motivations. One common concern that I hear a lot about comes from women who are concerned that their husband truly wants a divorce because he wants to start seeing other women. These concerns are understandable. ...
Views: 1783 - My Separated Husband Never Apologizes. He's Nasty And Rude To Me. Should I Be Mean To Him Or Demand An Apology In Response? - by Submitted on May 07, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany wives are very disappointed in the way that their husband is acting during a trial or marital separation. Often, the wives had hoped that the time apart would actually improve both people's behavior. But, much to their dismay, the opposite has happened. One might say: "things weren't ...
Views: 612 - My Separated Husband Never Comforts Me When I'm Upset. Should He Still Care For Me Emotionally? Tips For Improving His Emotional Intelligence. - by Submitted on May 06, 2020 from Leslie CaneIt's common for wives to feel that their husband is not as emotionally connected as they are. This can be true whether you are currently separated or not. (A separation does add another complication to the mix, but most wives have wondered if their husband is as emotionally invested as he should ...
Views: 1279 - My Separated Husband Says He's Hurt Me Too Much To Come Home. What Now? - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from wives whose husband is telling them that he isn't ready to come home or commit to the marriage because he fears that he's done something that has hurt her or his marriage too much. I might hear: “my husband left home about six weeks ago. He admitted to having an affair ...
Views: 602 - My Separated Husband Says If He Comes Home Now, It Will Only Be Out Of Guilt - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2020 from Leslie CaneI hear from wives who are trying everything in their power to get their husbands to come back home. And some of the husbands will give the wives every reason under the sun why he can't come home. Sometimes, these reasons sound a lot like excuses and the wife can begin to wonder if he will ever ...
Views: 694 - My Separated Husband Says It's Over Between Us. He Wants To Know Why I Won't Accept It. - by Submitted on Apr 26, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from wives who want to believe in their hearts that there is still a chance for their separated marriage. However, their husband isn't nearly as optimistic and he will sometimes try to convince the wife that she should just accept that there may not be a reconciliation. Often, ...
Views: 531 - My Separated Husband Wants Nothing To Do With Me. How Do I Get Him Back If He Doesn't Call Or Come Around? - by Submitted on Apr 25, 2020 from Leslie CaneThere are many difficult situations one must navigate during a marital separation. Here is a common one: You been asked to give your husband space. You know that you should comply. However, once you do, how will you ever reconcile? If you rarely see him and no one is calling or visiting, how can ...
Views: 707 - My Spouse Is Asking For A Separation. I Say No And Ignore His Requests. But He Keeps Asking. What Now? - by Submitted on Apr 26, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often hear from people who want to get their spouse to stop constantly asking for a separation. Much of the time, they have considered many tactics in order to help them to achieve this. One common tactic is to respond with a firm "no" and then to ignore their spouse. They are hoping that if ...
Views: 692 - Our Marriage Is In Serious Trouble. What If My Husband Leaves? I'm So Anxious About This. - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2020 from Leslie CaneMost people who value their marriage see their spouse leaving them, initiating a separation, or filing for divorce as the worst-case scenario. No one wants to be abandoned by their spouse or unsure about the future of their marriage. And, if you think that any of these things are possible, then ...
Views: 567 - Our Marriage Is Inconvenient For My Husband. He Feels Tied Down And Old. I'm Afraid He's Going To Leave Me - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany wives are struggling to deal with disappointed husbands. Often, the husband has alluded to the fact (or he has come right out and said) that he's disappointed in the marriage because it isn't what he was expecting or hoping for. It's nearly impossible to hear these types of discussions ...
Views: 685 - Our Marriage Is Loveless But I Can't Leave: Finding Happiness In An Unhappy Marriage - Tips and Advice That May Help - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2020 from Leslie CaneI recently received an email from a wife who described her marriage as "loveless." However, she told me that she had two children whom she would never dream of putting through a divorce. She could not stand the thought of forcing her kids to grow up in a single-parent home. So, she knew that ...
Views: 492 - Overcoming Marital Challenges And Deterioration When You Feel Like Your Marriage Won't Ever Get Any Better And Will Only Get Worse. - by Submitted on May 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneIt’s easy to lose perspective when your marriage deteriorates and becomes unhappy. Like with anything else that turns bad, it can begin to feel as if things will never change or improve. Each day can seem worse than the last. And one wonders if the clouds will ever lift. Someone might ...
Views: 729