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Articles from Leslie Cane | Selfgrowth.com
- My Husband Refuses To Change. He Tells Me What I Want To Hear But Nothing Ever Changes - by Submitted on May 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany people are pretty clear about what they need from their spouses in order to be happy in their marriage. And sometimes, the more unhappy you are in your marriage, the more you spell this out for your spouse. That's why it can be very frustrating when your spouse assures you that you are ...
Views: 697 - My Husband Agreed To Try To Make Our Marriage Work Even Though He's Not In Love With Me - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2020 from Leslie CaneSometimes, I hear from women who are deeply conflicted about their troubled marriage. At this time, their greatest wish is to convince their husband to try to make their marriage work. Usually, it's become crystal clear that the marriage is crumbling. And, because the wife is still invested in ...
Views: 695 - My Separated Husband Says If He Comes Home Now, It Will Only Be Out Of Guilt - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2020 from Leslie CaneI hear from wives who are trying everything in their power to get their husbands to come back home. And some of the husbands will give the wives every reason under the sun why he can't come home. Sometimes, these reasons sound a lot like excuses and the wife can begin to wonder if he will ever ...
Views: 694 - What To Say To A Husband Who Is About To Leave You: The Words To Say To Eventually Save Your Marriage - by Submitted on Apr 29, 2020 from Leslie CaneI know the feeling that many wives have when their husband is about to walk out the door to pursue a break or separation. There can be a sense of panic. You can feel desperate. And you are more likely to say or do something that you might regret. This article will outline the things that I ...
Views: 693 - My Spouse Is Asking For A Separation. I Say No And Ignore His Requests. But He Keeps Asking. What Now? - by Submitted on Apr 26, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often hear from people who want to get their spouse to stop constantly asking for a separation. Much of the time, they have considered many tactics in order to help them to achieve this. One common tactic is to respond with a firm "no" and then to ignore their spouse. They are hoping that if ...
Views: 692 - My Husband Ignores Me And Watches TV. He Doesn't Leave Me, But He Doesn't Want To Stay Either - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2020 from Leslie CaneIf you were to ask a separated wife who was living without her husband if she wanted him back even if he didn't 100% want to be there, many separated wives would say that yes, she would want him back however she could get him. However, if you are a wife who knows that your husband doesn't want ...
Views: 690 - Our Marriage Is Inconvenient For My Husband. He Feels Tied Down And Old. I'm Afraid He's Going To Leave Me - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany wives are struggling to deal with disappointed husbands. Often, the husband has alluded to the fact (or he has come right out and said) that he's disappointed in the marriage because it isn't what he was expecting or hoping for. It's nearly impossible to hear these types of discussions ...
Views: 685 - How to Have Meaningful Conversations With Your Separated Spouse - by Submitted on Apr 08, 2020 from Leslie CaneWhen you are reluctantly separated and want to save your marriage, you often intuitively know that communication is vitally important. Saving your marriage means that you are going to eventually need to overcome what drove you apart in the first place and then re-create the intimacy that will ...
Views: 681 - What If My Husband Won't Forgive Me? How Can He Forgive Me For Being So Mean For So Long? - by Submitted on Apr 29, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from people who have begun to do a lot of self-work either in an attempt to save their marriage or as an attempt to improve themselves. Sometimes, they go into this process thinking that much of the problems in their marriage lie with their spouse. But as they really begin to ...
Views: 679 - How Do I Give My Husband What He Needs To Save Our Marriage? - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany wives who feel as if their marriage is in trouble suspect that they aren't giving their husband what he needs to feel completely happy in the marriage. Sometimes, these unsatisfied husbands will tell their wives exactly why they are so unhappy with complaints like: “I just don't feel like ...
Views: 677 - My Husband Lies All The Time. I Feel Like I Can't Trust Him And This Is Hurting Our Marriage - by Submitted on Apr 14, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany wives struggle with how to address their husband's lies. Sometimes, these lies have to do with very important things like money, fidelity, and the marriage itself. Other times, the lies themselves aren't about serious or deal-breaking topics, but the fact that he continuously lies to you ...
Views: 675 - How Do I Reconnect With My Separated Husband? Steps To Follow When He's Moving Back Home After A Trial Separation. - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2020 from Leslie CaneHaving your spouse move back in after a trial separation is a goal that most of us are hoping for more than anything else. That is the day that is marked in red on your calendar. That is the day that is going to seem like Christmas morning and your birthday all rolled into one. But as the ...
Views: 673 - Mixed Messages During The Separation Or Divorce: He Says He Wants To Get Back Together In Front Of The Kids, But He Doesn't Act On It - by Submitted on Apr 24, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany wives have separated husbands who are saying one thing in front of the kids, but are then saying different things behind closed doors. Many times, the husband will put on a happy face or paint a positive picture about getting back together when the children are around. But, when the ...
Views: 672 - How To Bring Your Marriage Back To Life: How To Get Back You've Lost In A Lifeless Marriage - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2020 from Leslie CaneSome wives have finally convinced their husbands to commit to saving or reviving their marriage. But often once they have reached this milestone, they aren't sure what to do next. A wife might explain: "for the last couple of years, my husband and I have drifted further and further apart. ...
Views: 671 - I Don't Feel Loved By My Husband. I Feel Ignored And Unimportant. How Do I Tell Him And Explain This So He Will Listen? - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2020 from Leslie CaneNo one wants to look for trouble in their marriage where none exists. I've seen perfectly good marriages struggle greatly because one spouse decided to over-analyze and complain about even the smallest, most benign issues. So it can be very important to separate the big issues from the little ...
Views: 670 - Signs Your Husband Doesn't Want to Be Married to You Anymore (And What You Can Begin To Do About It) - by Submitted on May 05, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often get emails from wives who suspect that their husband no longer wants to be in the relationship. Often, people ask me for "signs that a husband doesn't want to be married or in the marriage anymore." And, I often will respond with a list of danger signs to watch for, but I also typically ...
Views: 668 - My Husband Is So Stressed Out And Now He Wants To Walk Out On Me. How Do I Help Him Handle The Stress So We Can Save Our Marriage? - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from people who are sure that the stressful situation in their lives is directly behind their marital problems, their separation, or their upcoming divorce. They will tell you that they had a wonderful marriage before the event reared its ugly head. And they don't know how to ...
Views: 665 - How To Deal With An Arrogant Husband During Your Separation: My Husband Says I Can't Let Go Of Him. - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany husbands who initiate a separation are fairly confident about their wives' level of commitment during it. After all, it is the husband who wanted to separate in the first place. Since many wives don't want any marital break, we often assume that the wife will cling to her marriage for dear ...
Views: 662 - My Husband Hurts My Feelings All Of The Time. I'm Not Sure It's Good For Me To Be Married To Someone Who Is So Insensitive - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2020 from Leslie CaneI rarely get correspondence from wives telling me that their husband is too sweet, too sensitive, or too concerned about their feelings. Sure, I get the occasional complaint that a husband is too involved in the wife's life, but this is rare. More often, I hear from wives who complain that ...
Views: 661 - How Do I Communicate With My Husband Without Fighting?: How To Avoid Anger, Frustration, And Shut Down - by Submitted on Apr 24, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany of the people who write to me about the problems or troubles in their marriages realize that a break down in communication is one of the major issues that they face and need to overcome. As easy as it is to identify that you have these issues, it can be more difficult to actually improve ...
Views: 660 - My Depressed Husband Feels Nothing, Doesn't Love Me Anymore, and Wants a Divorce. It's Almost Like He Blames Me For His Depression. - by Submitted on Apr 21, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes get emails from wives whose husbands are dealing with some form of depression. The descriptions given run the gauntlet from clinical depression to a chemical imbalance, to bipolar disorder, to manic depressive disorder. And, in today's very tough economic environment, folks are ...
Views: 659 - I Don't Feel Intimate In My Marriage. I No Longer Feel A Connection. What Can I Do? - by Submitted on May 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneI recently received correspondence from a wife who told me that she was afraid that she losing feelings of love for her husband. She specifically said that she no longer felt "connected" or "intimate" with him and she suspected that he felt the same way. They weren't being ugly to one another or ...
Views: 657 - My Husband Feels That Our Marriage is Not Workable - Tips and Advice That May Help When Your Spouse Feels Your Marriage Is Broken - by Submitted on May 08, 2020 from Leslie CaneThe other day, I received an email from a wife who said that no matter what she says or does, she can not convince her husband that their marriage can be made better or can be saved. She said in part: "I just can't get my husband to understand and believe that if we were both committed to doing ...
Views: 657 - I Lied To My Husband And Now He Wants A Divorce: How To Save Your Marriage When You've Lied To Your Husband - by Submitted on May 04, 2020 from Leslie CaneI recently heard from a wife who told me that her husband had firmly told her that he was "sick of" her lies and was considering a divorce. The wife had to admit that the husband was extremely justified in his frustration. In truth, the wife had lied to him early in their relationship. And, to ...
Views: 652 - Is My Marriage Worth Saving Quiz: True Or False Questions To Help You Decide - by Submitted on Apr 16, 2020 from Leslie CaneI hear from a lot of folks who are trying to decide if their marriage is worth saving. They often want to tell me the details of their marriage and then get my opinion as to whether they should fight for their marriage or just give in and call it quits. The thing is, I never feel that I'm really ...
Views: 651 - My Husband Is Not Interested In Me Anymore. Does A Husband's Distance Mean He No Longer Loves You? - by Submitted on May 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneI get a lot of correspondence from wives lamenting a husband's distance, coldness, and aloofness. Some of these come from wives who are already separated and others come from wives who are still married, but who suspect that their spouse may be contemplating a break or separation. These wives ...
Views: 651 - My Husband Will Not Talk To Me After We Had A Fight And He Left. How Can I Save My Marriage When He's Giving Me The Silent Treatment? - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from folks who want more than anything to have a chance to save their marriage, especially when they perceive that the issues within that same marriage are all of their faults. However, sometimes not only is the issue that has threatened the marriage difficult to overcome, but ...
Views: 649 - Want To Repair Your Marriage? Why You Shouldn't Use The Word "Repair" When You Want To Fix Your Marriage. Here's What To Say Instead. - by Submitted on Apr 24, 2020 from Leslie CaneI'm all about preventing divorce and stale marriages through positive means, but I have to tell you, I cringe when I hear the phrase "repairing a marriage." When you vocalize that you want to "repair your marriage," it's as if you view your marriage as a rusty, broken-down car that's been ...
Views: 645 - My Husband Puts His Friends Ahead Of Me. He Does Not Fully Meet His Commitments To Me Or Honor Our Marriage Vows - by Submitted on May 11, 2020 from Leslie CaneIt's not uncommon for me to hear from people who have discovered that their marriage hasn't turned out how they thought that it would. Many see this as a negative thing because they perceive that their spouse is falling short in some way. And many feel as if their spouse isn't meeting his or her ...
Views: 642 - My Husband Wants A Divorce, But Still Wants To Have Sex. How To Evaluate If It's Right To Continue Having Sex - by Submitted on Apr 18, 2020 from Leslie CaneThis question is actually more common than you may think. When couples are in crisis or are in talks about taking a break, splitting up, or divorcing, emotions can run high and doubt can creep in. Affection, attraction, and love can still be smoldering under the surface even if a couple is ...
Views: 642 - My Husband Says Our Marriage Is Not What He Wants Anymore And Insists He Won't Change His Mind. What Now? - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2020 from Leslie CaneKnowing the couple I'm about to describe as I already do, I can pretty much picture the scene in my mind. And since I myself went through the same scene in what seems like another lifetime ago, I've felt what I know that the wife is feeling right now. I can literally not only see what probably ...
Views: 640 - My Husband And I Never Have Fun Anymore: He Says I'm No Fun And Boring So He Wants A Separation - by Submitted on May 06, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often hear from people who are facing a separation and who don't necessarily agree with the reasoning that their spouse is offering up. And even if they do see some validity to their reasoning, they often just don't how to change who or what they already are. Here's just one example. I ...
Views: 638 - My Husband Hasn't Talked About The Divorce In Months. Does This Mean I'm In The Clear? - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2020 from Leslie CaneI speak with wives who know that their husband wants a divorce because he has either told them of his intentions directly or filed divorce papers. Sometimes though, the panic that they feel about this (especially when they don't want a divorce) gets a reprieve because the husband one day just ...
Views: 636 - My Husband Says He's Not Happy And Wants To Leave. He Feels He'd Be Happier Without Me. What Do I Do? - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2020 from Leslie CaneIn some matters, it feels as if it almost pays to be naive or in the dark - at least where your marriage is concerned. Because some knowledge can never be unlearned once you learn it. And when it is something that is very hurtful - like your spouse being unhappy or considering a separation or ...
Views: 636 - My Husband Is An Unhappy Person. No Matter What I Do, He Won't Stop Complaining About Our Marriage. Tips That Might Help - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2020 from Leslie CaneIt can be very hurtful and frustrating when your spouse constantly complains about a certain level of unhappiness despite improvements that you've tried to make. You might think that you've addressed his concerns, only to turn around and find that he is sullen and unhappy again. It can begin ...
Views: 633 - Signs Your Husband Wants You Back: Negative And Positive Clues That Mean He's Coming Around. - by Submitted on Apr 20, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often write about saving marriages. Or, if a separation or divorce has happened, I sometimes try to help the wife to get her husband back (so long as the relationship was a healthy one worth saving.) Often times, I'm contacted by wives who want to know the "signs that my husband wants me ...
Views: 633 - Should I Tell My Husband That I Can't Live Without Him? Here's What You Should Do Instead Because This Strategy May Work Better - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2020 from Leslie CaneBelieve it or not, I get this question quite a bit. It usually comes from wives who feel that a divorce or separation is imminent and they do not know how they are going to survive without living together and/or being married. These wives are looking for something to stop the bleeding so to ...
Views: 632 - My Husband Won't Say Why He Left Me. - by Submitted on Apr 18, 2020 from Leslie CaneI recently heard from a wife who just wasn't sure what to do. Her husband had left her and the home the week before and now was not accepting her calls, texts, or emails. Anytime that she did get him on the phone, placed herself in front of him, and had his attention for long enough to get a ...
Views: 629 - Steps to Repair a Marriage: Three Steps You Can Take Right Now - by Submitted on Apr 14, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often hear from people who want step-by-step instructions on how to repair their marriage. Often, they know that some change needs to happen, but they just don't know where to start. And, they are afraid of doing something that is only going to make matters worse. Many tell me they think that ...
Views: 629 - My Husband Takes Me (And Our Marriage) For Granted: He Alway Says He Will Work On Our Marriage But Then He Doesn't Do A Thing - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2020 from Leslie CaneIt can get very frustrating when you've become dissatisfied with your marriage, but are also very unhappy with your spouse's attempt to resolve it. His complacency can make you feel as if he is taking you (and the marriage) for granted. You may get up your courage to tell him that this just ...
Views: 628 - How Do I Make My Husband Want To Stay Married To Me When He Has One Foot Out The Door? - by Submitted on Apr 24, 2020 from Leslie CaneThe emails that I get are often from the spouse who wants to remain married and who wants advice on how to get their husband, wife, or partner back on board. Typically, one spouse will say, hint at, or act like they don't want to be married anymore, but this is not at all the way that the still ...
Views: 627 - Can A Marriage Survive A Blended Family? My Husband Doesn't Like My Kids. I Feel Like I Have To Choose Between My Spouse And My Children. - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2020 from Leslie CaneThere's an old saying which goes: "when you marry someone, you are also marrying their family - their parents, their children, and their siblings." Of course, when you are deeply in love, you figure that you can handle any extended family that comes your way. And sometimes, families actually get ...
Views: 626 - Tips For Working On Yourself During A Separation: How To Find Yourself And Get Your Life (And Husband) Back - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2020 from Leslie CaneWhen many of us have been in a relationship as important as our marriage, we can begin to define ourselves by it, at least in part. We come to identify ourselves as a wife, or as part of a family. So when that coupling is questioned or is paused, it can literally feel as if we have lost a part ...
Views: 626 - Easy Tips To Prevent Your Husband From Divorcing You - by Submitted on Apr 09, 2020 from Leslie CaneMost of the people who contact me are willing to do just about anything to save their marriage and prevent a divorce. Sometimes, their spouse doesn't want a divorce either, but this isn't always the case. The situation that I most often see is that one spouse is considering a divorce, while the ...
Views: 623 - My Husband Is Not Affectionate And Is Cold. I Feel Sexually Inadequate. Why Is It So Hard For Him? What Does It Mean? - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2020 from Leslie CaneAs women, we are often naturally affectionate. It is often not any effort for us to touch someone's arm, offer a hug, or tell those who we love just how great we think they are. In fact, many of us feel that this is at least one reason why we were put on this earth - to enhance the lives of ...
Views: 622 - How To Fight For Your Marriage Without Fighting With Your Husband: Hint. You Don't "Fight" At All - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often write articles about saving marriages. Perhaps it's because wives research this topic more than men, or perhaps it's because women are more proactive in their marriages, but I'm most often contacted by wives (and a few husbands too) who tell me something like: "Our relationship is in ...
Views: 619 - I Just Don't Feel That My Husband Loves Me - by Submitted on Apr 09, 2020 from Leslie CaneI recently heard from a wife who felt strongly that her husband no longer loved her. For the past couple of years, she had noticed a shift in her marriage. He no longer lit up when he looked at her. He no longer listened intently when she talked. He no longer spontaneously touched her or showed ...
Views: 619 - My Husband Makes Me Feel Invisible: Sometimes I Want To Leave Him Because He Doesn't Appreciate Me. - by Submitted on Apr 25, 2020 from Leslie CaneI sometimes hear from people who feel desperately unappreciated by their spouse. At first, they will sometimes try to tell themselves that they are expecting too much or being too needy. But, with time, when it doesn't ever get any better, it starts to wear on you. And you begin to wonder if ...
Views: 619 - How Do I Save My Marriage When He Doesn't Want To? My Husband Doesn't Want To Be Married Anymore But I Do. - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2020 from Leslie CaneI often hear from people who are trying to decide their next course of action after their spouse has announced that they no longer want to be married. Recently, I heard from a wife who said, in part: "Out of the blue, my husband sat me down and told me that he doesn't want to be married anymore. ...
Views: 618 - I Want To Make My Marriage Work, But I'm Not Sure If It's Possible Anymore. - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2020 from Leslie CaneMany wives who contact me are going through some serious turmoil within their marriage. Some are just beginning a separation and some have even been served with divorce papers. Others just know that their marriage is in serious trouble. Despite all of the drama going on their lives, many of ...
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