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Articles from Dr. Dennis Neder | Selfgrowth.com
- The Anti-Valentine’s Day Valentine’s Day - by Submitted on Jan 27, 2012 from Dr. Dennis NederSo, what’s it going to be this year? Crowded, noisy restaurant with lousy service? The usually dozen red roses? Jewelry? Card? A lot of whimpering and crying? Here’s the problem with Valentine’s Day: It has become the lousiest “Hallmark Holiday” on the calendar. It’s supposed to be a day ...
Views: 1299 - The Bureaucrat And The Girl - by Submitted on Nov 05, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dennis, Five years ago, I hired this bright, good looking employee. She delivered her results well, and soon moved to an assistant manager position through department assessments. All through, I heard of her 'negativity' and 'attitude', from female managers, and felt this may be female ...
Views: 678 - The Cheating Girlfriend - by Submitted on Jan 23, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc, I've been with my girlfriend for about a year and a half now and we're both 18. She told me last night that she had cheated on me while on holiday recently. She said a guy kissed her, while she was drunk, and she only realized after a few seconds what was happening and stopped it. I ...
Views: 4767 - The Farmer's Milk - by Submitted on Aug 17, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederHello, I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 11 months. Just the other day he tells me that he thinks we should just remain friends and nothing more. Two days later he called me and we talked about our relationship and he told me that I do make him happy and he enjoys our ...
Views: 835 - The Girl at Work - by Submitted on Oct 11, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I have liked a woman at my work for sometime now. We were out with others from work one evening and I admitted to her how I felt after getting a little drunk. She was perfectly sober since she was the designated driver. At the same time, she told me that she was also attracted ...
Views: 893 - The Magic of the Approach - by Submitted on Mar 15, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHave you ever seen a magician at a party walking around doing close-up magic? Everyone seems fascinated by it – even if the magician isn’t that good. There are probably just as many people hoping the performer will flop as those that are fascinated by it. This brings me to an interesting way to ...
Views: 829 - The Older Woman - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I'm 21 years old and this girl that I've been talking to is turning 28 pretty soon. This girl has been really down on the dumps with personal problems, losing family members, etc. and we've been keeping each other "company" if you will. I want more than that however. I have a feeling ...
Views: 718 - The Problem: Inertia - by Submitted on Oct 18, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Dennis: I’ve read a number of your articles where you talk about having “game” (the ability to meet women, get numbers, etc.) Unfortunately, I don’t have any! I’m more of a home-type person who wants to get out and do more with life but a lot of times I find it difficult to do. It ...
Views: 882 - The Reality of “Being Friends” - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doctor, I am getting to know a Christian girl. We have been going out for almost two months and I told her that I like her. In the beginning she told me that she was not interested in a relationship right now but was ok with being friends and she continues to go out with me. She answers my ...
Views: 850 - The Rules of Fidelity - by Submitted on Jul 12, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDoctor Neder: I am in a serious relationship of almost a year. We have one major problem that continues to come up. When we were first dating, we'd been out maybe a dozen times and slept together maybe 6 times, had no conversations about being exclusive and at a party I was intimate with ...
Views: 2069 - The Six “R’s” for Getting Your Ex Back - by Submitted on Nov 13, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederEven a broken watch is right twice a day, and yes, many people DO get their ex's back. The real question you should be asking however is "should you?" Nature plays this glorious trick on each of us. When we break up with someone, we're angry and hurt, we feel loss and helplessness. We have a ...
Views: 1738 - The Three Keys to the Cold Approach - by Submitted on Mar 08, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDo you find it difficult to approach women you don’t know? Most guys do so don’t feel alone. I’m going to give you the three keys that’ll make the cold approach easy, fun and very, very profitable. Key #1 – Practice talking to everyone, everywhere If the only time you try to talk to strangers ...
Views: 8146 - The “Loaded Weapon” - by Submitted on Dec 26, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDoc: Ever since I started living with my boyfriend I've caught him masturbating. At the beginning he would watch porno and masturbate, I told him this really upset me and he said that he wouldn't do it again. He also eventually got rid of all the porno. Well everything was good - or at least ...
Views: 716 - This Guy Is Too Damn Nice! - by Submitted on Oct 29, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I am 22 and the guy I am writing about is 35. The age difference doesn’t bother me at all but the fact he treats me like a princess does. I have always been attracted to the bad boy type so really I am not sure why I was even attracted to this guy. He is an amazing guy ...
Views: 786 - Trouble in Break-Up City - by Submitted on Dec 20, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDr. Neder, My fiancé decided it was best to end our two year relationship about a month and a half ago. In this time I have realized why she did it and that she meant more to me than I ever knew. I made a lot of mistakes that I didn't see until now. I talked to her about a month ago and ...
Views: 912 - Trying to Reconcile - by Submitted on Jun 24, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc! My girlfriend and I broke up about 5 weeks ago. I’m 22 and we have been dating 3 years - on and off for 5. She broke up with me because of the way I was treating her, I was being a pretty bad boyfriend. So, after 5 weeks we had a talk and she was willing to open her heart for me to come ...
Views: 1443 - Turning Down a "Friend" - by Submitted on Oct 31, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I had a friend that is very important to me ask me out. I told him he was important, but just a friend. I didn't say “yes” to him because mostly I've been thinking about a couple of other guys, one in particular, that I want to go out with. They seemed to have shown signs ...
Views: 618 - What We Have Here Is a Failure to Communicate! - by Submitted on Oct 19, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I've been attending Massage Therapy class with this girl, and I really like her, but she won't give me anything except one word answers to anything I ask her! We've worked on each other here and there, but not actively. I usually ask her how she's doing, after long periods of ...
Views: 753 - What You Bring to the Table - by Submitted on Jan 12, 2013 from Dr. Dennis NederDuring the very first or second date with a new woman, I like to ask a simple question: “What do you bring to the table?” I love that question! I also love hearing it from someone I just met. Some people take offense to it assuming I should “just know” and “how dare I not know!” That’s ...
Views: 1677 - What’s Her Problem? - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederI met this girl online about 6 weeks ago and we clicked right away. We talked via the phone and internet for hours at a time almost every night. We even had live video sessions with each other so when she moved back into the area we met up face to face and she seemed to be interested in me. She ...
Views: 827 - When The Rules Change - by Submitted on Jul 23, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederMy Wife and I have been married for almost 8 years. We have 2 beautiful boys and a girl (7, 4 and 5 y/o.) Lately it has been totally impossible to get her to have "alone time" with me. I have tried talking to her, flirting with her and just doing special romantic things for her but every night ...
Views: 665 - When The Rules Change - by Submitted on Jul 30, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederI’ve been seeing this girl for 3 weeks now. We recently bumped into each other at a get together and were childhood sweethearts - big crushes on each other! Just a few days ago we where at a bar and her roommate introduced her to a friend and he instantly started hitting on her, right in front ...
Views: 706 - Where in the Hell are They? (Potential Partners) - by Submitted on Feb 07, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I'm 25, and I've been out of the dating scene as well as college for a couple of years now. I'm not a drinker, so I don't go to bars, and I'm not a dancer, so I don't go to clubs. So where can I go to meet someone who would date a guy like me? And what places are appropriate to ...
Views: 847 - Where to Start Learning “The Game” - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederI get a lot of “beginner” questions from men about dating, relationships, sex and “the game” in general. Actually, that’s a very good thing! It shows that guys are really trying to learn what it takes to become better players – and ultimately better partners for the women we love. So, how do ...
Views: 808 - Which Guys Are “Marriage Material”? - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDr. Dennis: What are some signs that a man is "marriage material" and that a woman should definitely consider pursuing him seriously? =================== Hello! One of the best signs is to check the ring finger of his left hand (at least here in the States); if there's a wedding band there, ...
Views: 2000 - Which is Best – Same or Different? - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I have a question which might sound a bit unusual but; do relationships work best between people who are different or people who are similar? ============= Hello! Actually, as with so many things, it depends! Obviously, it's a good idea to have some things in common such as hobbies, ...
Views: 800 - Who Can Have A Support Network? - by Submitted on Jan 09, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederMy boyfriend and I are in our late 30’s and have been dating for over 3 years. Today, in a casual conversation we were talking about our future and he made the comment, "I was talking to someone about our situation and..." The gist was that he was talking to this person about saving money to buy ...
Views: 564 - Why Can’t I Meet Someone That’s Available? - by Submitted on Jan 25, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Dr. Neder: HELP! Oh yes, a word you probably see all the time. But surely there is no plain and simple way to understand men or even women for that matter. Here’s my dilemma: I am a single, pretty, tall, 24-year-old woman. I have had a couple of boyfriends here and there, but just one ...
Views: 876 - Why Do Women Love Men? - by Submitted on Apr 08, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc, I have a question: why are women attracted to men (and not to each other)? I know what attracts me to women, women are beautiful and soft but I wonder what’s in women's brains that make them see men as more attractive than women? I can’t imagine my self kissing another man but why ...
Views: 2104 - Why is Having Sex Too Early Bad? - by Submitted on May 20, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dennis: The girls that give sex up front are getting all the guys, but they don't seem to keep them for long. Guys view them as a fuck buddy type thing but not for a real relationship. The women who wait a bit to give out sex live most of their lives lonely, but end up marrying the guy at ...
Views: 4122 - Why It's So Hard To Not Be A 'Nice Guy' - by Submitted on Jan 04, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederOh, how easy it is for us to slip into "nice guy" mode! We have a natural tendency to want to be nice guys and even believe that this is exactly what women want from us. As you probably know, it's not. Then, why do we do this? Let me tell you a little story (I'll keep it short): Many years ago, ...
Views: 840 - Why So Many Relationships? - by Submitted on Jul 04, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dennis, I read your books, and like their practicality. I have one question of theoretical nature: why is it that woman usually do have had more previous relationships than men, although they are 'supposed' to be the more monogamous gender? Are they just trying a lot more short-term ...
Views: 671 - Why “Working it From the Inside” Doesn’t Work - by Submitted on Jan 17, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederOne of the most common questions I get comes from guys starts off with “I have this woman friend. We’ve been close friends for over a year now, but she has a boyfriend…” Sound familiar? This is something I call trying to “work it from the inside”. In effect, these guys figure that if they can ...
Views: 894 - Will He Marry Me? - by Submitted on Dec 10, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc: I guess my situation is common but let me ask what you think any way. I am a 42 year old woman that has been dating a 50 year old man for 4 years now, we have been living together for 2 years now and we’re both divorced. When we met I was very clear what I wanted and he seemed ...
Views: 3308 - Women are Dumb! - by Submitted on Jul 18, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederYep! That’s right - women are dumb. Well ok, not all women are dumb but many of you sure do some dumb things when dating or in relationships. I get letters every day that just make me shake my head. I have to wonder whether or not these people really want to be in happy, healthy, fulfilling ...
Views: 773 - You Better Know How to Handle “The Test”! - by Submitted on Jan 10, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc! I met this girl a couple of months ago and we started to hang out. At first she said she only wanted to be friends when I made a move so I just blew it off but she continued to call me all the time wanting to see me. One night we went out, and she kept on flirting with me and getting ...
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