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Articles from Jeanne King, Ph.D. | Selfgrowth.com
- Emotionally Abusive Relationship - 5 Signs You’re Entering into an Emotionally Abusive Relationship - by Submitted on Feb 23, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Lack of emotional safety is the number one indicator of a potentially dangerous relationship. It may seem subtle, yet it is ever so significant with respect to your well-being. When you have emotional safety, it’s palatable. You can feel it in every fiber of your being. When it’s missing, you ...
Views: 2005 - Family Court Collateral: How Divorce Court Agents Feed on Maternal Instincts - by Submitted on Jan 27, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.It’s no secret that our children are collateral in family court. So, why is it that when we turn to this institution of justice, do we expect it to serve and protect the interests of our children? My sense of this is our educated mind doesn’t really expect anything more than what we ...
Views: 1097 - Family Court Violence - When Psychiatry and Law Serve as the Batterer’s Club - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Institutionalizing battered women in psychiatric hospitals is as old as prostitution. It’s an effective way to silence and discredit them. In My Own Practice I remember a case over 20 years ago in my own practice of a patient referred by a social worker for a stress-related neuromuscular ...
Views: 1098 - Family Court Violence and Crazy-Making Maneuvers - by Submitted on Apr 24, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.If I tell you that you are “crazy” and threaten to punish you because of what I have said, a part of you begins to question that maybe what I have alleged is true. Crazy-Making from the Outside In Then, if I tell someone in authority that you are “crazy” and consequently they set forth to ...
Views: 1114 - Family Violence - Lost Mothers, Lied To Children & The Legal Abuse Syndrome - by Submitted on Jul 31, 2008 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.“Where is your Mom?” asked a little boy to another. The little boy replied, “I don’t know.” From his point of view, she was lost. She was gone. She left him. She abandoned him. ...And the conclusions go on and on, each one with more and more potential to fracture a ...
Views: 1016 - Family Violence Healing: 3 Keys to Healing Parental Alienation - by Submitted on Dec 09, 2008 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.When children go away to college and get away from “who and what” the controlling family members want them to be, a window opens up. What they discover is their essence. Now here’s the gem... That essence is a composite of their formative years. If you were in their lives ...
Views: 943 - Friend or Daughter in an Abusive Relationship - 3 Secrets to Saving Your Relationship with Them - by Submitted on Mar 14, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Why do we hate victims of domestic abuse? We hate the hold their perpetrators have over them when it interferes with us getting what love and affection we are accustom to receiving from them. We hate the frustration of not being able to shake them awake. We hate their choosing to be controlled ...
Views: 1092 - Healing from Emotional Abuse – The Mind-Emotion-Body Connection in Healing for Emotional Abuse - by Submitted on Mar 28, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.The mind-emotion-body connection is something some of us take for granted, while others remain in awe. I do both. Now here is a little psychological insight that will open doors for your recovery from psychological, mental and emotional abuse. Go ahead and get your coffee or herbal tea ...
Views: 1226 - Healing from Emotional Abuse: Overcoming Obstacles and Obtaining Benefits from Meditation - by Submitted on Jan 10, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.I hear people claim they can’t meditate and so they opt for some other form of relaxation or marshal art. My hunch is they can meditate if and when they get out of their way. Meditation is fundamentally not a doing activity, though there is a discipline of routine and mechanics involved. ...
Views: 1214 - Healing from Emotional Abuse: The Memory is in the Muscle - by Submitted on Feb 21, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.The memory is in the muscle. We hear people vividly taste remnants of the feelings surrounding old trauma when faced with a trigger of the context in which that original trauma was experienced. It’s truly as though the memory is in the muscle. We know this phenomenon to be characteristic of ...
Views: 1605 - How to Break the Cycle of Domestic Abuse - by Submitted on Jan 06, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.A common question people ask is what are some practical ways to break the cycle of abuse? First is identifying the syndrome It is essential that you have identified the cluster of symptoms that defines domestic violence and understand how it lives in your life. Giving it a name is number ...
Views: 1511 - How to Help Shine the Light on Domestic Abuse - by Submitted on Mar 11, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.I’m frequently approached by families to help them “yank” their adult daughter or son out of an abusive relationship. And they come to me wanting me to “do it” as they have attempted to “do it.” That is by trying to influence their adult child’s choices in whatever way the parents are accustomed ...
Views: 1058 - Interactional Relationship Abuse VS Intimate Partner Violence: 3 Distinguishing Characteristics - by Submitted on Apr 09, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.We hear a lot about the “he said, she said” when it comes to relationship violence. The challenge for advocates and interventionists is to accurately ascertain, not only “who did what” but even more revealing, what are the underlying dynamics inspiring the altercations between the ...
Views: 1279 - Lack of Emotional Safety as a Sign of an Abusive Relationship - by Submitted on Feb 09, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Emotional safety is vague when it isn’t there, and it’s ever so palatable when it is. What is being emotionally safe? And how does this serve as an indicator...an internal red flag of a potentially destructive relationship. What is emotional safety? Emotionally safe is a feeling ...
Views: 1699 - Leaving an Abusive Relationship - How to Insure a Safe Departure from an Abusive Relationship - by Submitted on Dec 14, 2008 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.If you’ve read my writing you know I’m a proponent of leaving an abusive relationship quickly and quietly, when you decide to do so. Now that doesn’t mean you jump in the car and go “out of the blue.” No not at all. Because if you do, chances are you’ll be ...
Views: 848 - Leaving an Abusive Relationship – The Victim’s Power After the Altercation - by Submitted on Mar 08, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.When is the best time to grab a victim out of an abusive relationship? There are two points of intervention. That is, there are two times when she/he is MOST amenable to leaving the abusive relationship. What are these times? 1) Before she/he settles into the relationship and becomes part of ...
Views: 1557 - Legal Domestic Abuse: 7 Signs Your Attorney Has a Vested Interest in Helping Your Opposition - by Submitted on Dec 28, 2008 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Imagine rallying up the courage to leave an abusive partner and find yourself in a relationship with counsel in which you are the same as you were in relation to your partner...only difference is you’re in the seduction/promises phase of the relationship. Far too often we see women seek ...
Views: 852 - Legal Domestic Violence - 3 Secrets of Divorce Lawyer’s Seduction Strategy with Battered Women - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Oftentimes battered women leave abusers only to find out that they are in an abusive relationship with their own divorce lawyer. And unfortunately, many spend as long awakening to this reality as they did admitting the abuse they endured by their former intimate partner. Here are some seduction ...
Views: 1031 - Obstacles to Leaving an Abusive Relationship - by Submitted on Jan 26, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.We hear a lot about leaving an abusive relationship. Those on the outside say you must. Those on the inside know they ultimately will. And those responsible for the abuse say you can’t, shouldn’t and better not or else! What are the real obstacles to leaving an abusive ...
Views: 1352 - Psychological Abuse and Divorce: Mental Illness by Layman’s Declaration - by Submitted on Jun 09, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.For almost every battered woman and abused man I work with, there is a layman’s label attached to the core of their self-perception. This label is typically bestowed upon them by their battering partner or by allies supporting his/her plight to save face and to discredit and silence the ...
Views: 1819 - Psychological Abuse: 3 Signs of Crazy-Making by Family, by Friend, by Enemy - by Submitted on May 25, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.We know it happens; yet when we see it, we’re in shock. And when we experience it, we’re numb. How can a family member, who once claimed to cherish you, plot to back you into a fabricated psychiatric label and sentence of craziness? That is the question that dumbfounds anyone who walks in these ...
Views: 3990 - Psychological Abuse: 6 Tips to Counter Being Improperly Labeled with a Psychiatric Diagnosis - by Submitted on Jun 02, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.As a psychologist, domestic abuse consultant and one who has known domestic violence personally, I’m frequently approached by battered women for “psychological truth.” They are eager to know if the names and labels given to them by their abusive partners, or by the court agents acting on their ...
Views: 1523 - Psychological Legal Abuse – Mental Illness by Psychological and Mental Abuse - by Submitted on Apr 21, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.The use of psychology or psychiatry to contain and control a family member (or close friend) is almost as old as psychiatry itself. Not well publicized, however a practice that dates back decades. From time to time, you may see a person wearing a psychiatric diagnosis that was inspired by the ...
Views: 1189 - Recovering From Physical Abuse: 3 Keys To Your Body's Miracle Makeover After The Domestic Abuse Assault - by Submitted on Aug 05, 2008 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Broken bones, ruptured spleen, bruised swollen tissue, and ultimately a diagnosed clinical condition labeled as “degenerative disc.” Such a label can connote a permanent, defective body part, and ultimately an image of broken body. I hear domestic violence survivors talk about their ...
Views: 1077 - Signs Of Abusive Relationships: Conditioning that Kills From The Inside Out In Abusive Relationships - by Submitted on Sep 25, 2008 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.We know the drama of domestic abuse from the outside looking in, as it is popularized by the media and by entertainment mediums. But the silent insidious inner deaths that take place are more pervasive and, and in some cases, more debilitating for the domestic abuse survivor. What are the inner ...
Views: 893 - Signs of an Abusive Relationship - 6 Personal Questions that Can Help You See Partner Abuse - by Submitted on Mar 02, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.It's no secret that we see what we project. And when it comes to abuse, doing so can have repercussions for all of us. Prior abuse in one's life can set the stage for misinterpretations of our adult partner's actions, intentions, feelings and relationship to us. Now this doesn't mean that when ...
Views: 979 - Spousal Abuse or Substance Abuse: How Do You Know? - by Submitted on Jun 24, 2008 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.People often say my partner is abusive when he/she drinks. And from here, they deduce that they are dealing with partner or spousal abuse. However, that may or may not necessarily be so. How do you distinguish between abuse associated with alcohol and/or drug abuse from abuse associated with ...
Views: 1537 - Spousal Emotional Abuse - 3 Deadly Mistakes in Hiding from Verbal Abuse in Marriage - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Verbal abuse in marriage makes for a toxic home. You feel it in the air, smell it in your living space, see its brutal impact on yourself as well as on little ones dependent upon you. You know this from the core of your being, yet when victimized by verbal abuse in marriage, there is a tendency ...
Views: 1551 - The 7 Costly Mistakes Domestic Abuse Survivors Make with Their Divorce Lawyers - by Submitted on Mar 25, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Why do domestic abuse victims see the abuse dynamic in their home, but fail to recognize it in their divorce proceedings? The answer to this question is the same answer to the question, “Why doesn’t she awaken to the abuse in her home?” You know the answer: she is part of the very dynamic for ...
Views: 1357 - The Childless Scarlet A: Healing from Family Violence and Legal Domestic Abuse - by Submitted on May 28, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Some wounds are so severe that words cannot capture their complete pain. Being pushed out of one’s children’s lives or the lives of your grandchildren is one of these. When this is yours, the depths of it take your breath away. I hear women tell me the cries that come out of them over their ...
Views: 1095 - The Intergenerational Transmission of the Cycle of Family Abuse - by Submitted on Mar 18, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.If your home consists of one (or more) parent that batters, chances are higher that your children will acquire the same tendency to be controlling and use battering to get their way. Now this doesn’t mean that all children of abusers become abusers, as they may very well instead become victims ...
Views: 1252 - The Psychosocial Politics of Domestic Violence - by Submitted on Dec 18, 2008 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.As a psychologist, I’m often asked what is the psychopathology of individuals in abusive relationships? The perpetrator’s mental health status is usually more self-evident, whereas the victims’ mental health status is clouded with the psychosocial politics of domestic violence ...
Views: 1006 - The Role and Impact of Verbal Abuse in Abusive Relationships - by Submitted on Feb 10, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Intimate partner violence is best avoided by understanding emotional verbal abuse and the warning signs of an abusive relationship. In an effort to help educate people and increase awareness of verbal abuse, Kate Carlson, OTR/L interviews Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D. Kate Carlson: Throughout the ...
Views: 1564 - Understanding the Dynamics of Verbal Abuse in Abusive Relationships - by Submitted on Mar 13, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Verbal abuse is toxic. The following is Kate Carlson, OTR/L interviewing domestic abuse consulting expert Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D. in an effort to help people recognize and understand verbal abuse in unhealthy relationships. 1) KATE CARLSON: In your words, please define verbal abuse and ...
Views: 2046 - Verbal Abuse in Marriage – 3 Insights That Will Save You in the Face of Verbal Abuse - by Submitted on Mar 30, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Verbal abuse is toxic, especially when you are on the receiving end. It can wear you down, burn you out, and literally change the way you think and feel about yourself. But it doesn’t have to... Here are some insights that will help you hold your own in the face of verbal abuse. 1) Know that ...
Views: 1300 - Verbal Abuse Signs & Help – Understanding and Thriving beyond Verbal Abuse in Abusive Relationships - by Submitted on May 02, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Verbal abuse, as well as emotional abuse, result in wounds and scars deep within. In the following interview we look at the impact upon the victim and offer recommendations for her surviving and thriving beyond the battering. The following is part two of an interview with Kate Carlson, OTR/L ...
Views: 1644 - Victimization and Manipulation - 3 Tips for Satisfying Your Needs After the Abusive Relationship - by Submitted on May 09, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.We know that domestic abuse survivors endure the tremendous pressure of their controlling partners. And they become accustomed to manipulation as a means to fulfill one’s personal needs. It’s no wonder that manipulation becomes a method of choice when it comes to meeting their own individual ...
Views: 1258 - What You Must Know to Leave an Abusive Relationship Safely - by Submitted on Dec 01, 2008 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.Often times we hear that leaving an abuser, can be deadly. According to FBI reports 75% of all homicides by intimate male partners occurred after the victim left. Battered women are far more vulnerable to physical attack as well as attacks to their personal privacy, their civil liberties and ...
Views: 851 - When Parents Control - 3 Keys to Breaking Free from Parental Control - by Submitted on Mar 23, 2009 from Jeanne King, Ph.D.A controlling parent can have as much a crippling effect on an adult child as on an intimate partner. And I’m sure you know why. But help for that adult child is touch and go. There are no shelters for them, yet they have many of the same financial issues as battered women. If they haven’t ...
Views: 1857